Knowing Me, Knowing You

You said you didn't understand me either, how could I behave like this after what he did to me. It's a very fair point, one I asked myself too. Yet I've known the answer for some time: I didn't forgive, I will never forgive, because I can't, it's as if it doesn't depend on me. But the person that hurt me isn't the same as the one I want to be with, now - that one is gone, never to come back, and never forgiven. Because you can never forgive a lover that broke your heart, but you can dissociate him from your best friend from the past, and hang out with him. Not saying it isn't weird, probably it's very uncommon, but I'm not known for being normal either.

That song from Abba resonates in my head: "Breaking up is never easy, I know but I have to go". With no regrets, no shame or doubts, just go, because it's the right thing to do - and look back years after and knowing it was so indeed.

PS: And forgiving the possibilities in others is forgiving them in yourself - and we need to forgive ourselves, not just because of the selfhelp bullshit but because we also hurt others, more than we like to admit.

PSS: That moment when you realize you have been thinking way too much in English so you end up recording thoughts in English as well. Who cares anyway.